Agnostic Mom

My 7 year old son is a rule follower. Normally I like this trait a lot. It is very reassuring to me to know that he likes rules, and likes to follow them even more. It helps me avoid excessive motherly worry, since we don’t have the god-factor as a way to motivate our kids to make moral choices. Blake will follow most rules simply for rules’ sake. But there are times that this nature of his gets on my nerves just a bit.

The other morning we were running slightly late for school, as usual. While rounding up the kids to get in the car, Blake panicked, “Mom, mom! We need to turn in the money and orders for our school pictures today.” No, we don’t. School pictures are tomorrow. You turn them in when you get your picture taken. But Blake was almost hysterical. “I heard them say it on ZNC (school daily news show), They said we HAVE to turn them in today.” I knew he was wrong, and I didn’t have time to put the money together, but I also knew Blake would be freaking out if I didn’t just write the check and give it to him to turn in early.

So I gave Blake his way, filled out the packets, wrote out the checks, and rushed the three kiddies into the car. I was making up time on Main Street and taking on the role of victim with thoughts like, “I can’t believe he’s making me turn in the money early and now we’re late!” I despise playing this role, but find that I take it on a lot since I became a mother!

Then, interrupting my self-absorbed thoughts, came the voice of my 7-year old Gimminy Cricket, “Mom, you’re going 60 in a 50 mile per hour speed zone”.

“Blake, Leave Me Alone!!!!!!!!!!!!”

But it’s worth it. I often wonder what I would do if my kids had the “rule-breaker” gene instead. I admit, I would be more inclined to stay involved in church, only for the added effect of having a god-belief as a motivating factor for choice-making. This morning, Blake came to me from playing an online video game, and told me he shut down the game because someone used the F-word on it. I thanked him for making such a responsible choice. He reminded me of a test he took on Disney.com where the site instructed the children to log off and tell a parent if anyone ever uses “bad words” online, or is mean or a bully. And here was my child, doing exactly that. While I don’t beleve any religion is true, or has any real clue about what happens after death, I am not opposed to people involving themselves in one if it meets their needs and wants. I wonder if it would be beneficial to people whose children who are don’t look for rules like mine do. I don’t however, think that Sunday School lessons are essential for teaching children your moral values. I have found that just by being around my children, and always being the moral person that I am, my children learn everything they need to know. I truly believe that one day spent with good parents, is worth more than a lifetime of Sunday School lessons.